alrite, this is on my heart right now, and if youre reading this, i ask that you send up a prayer for me.
so, first off, im not easily offended or easily hurt, but i draw the line at some things. those things being my faith, authority and the fam and the homies. you say 1 thing bad about Jesus, my family or the homies, and we gon have issues. sorry, thats just me. im loyal to the ones i love.
anyway, i've always had issues with authority, especially authority in the church. idk, i guess i just grew up like the rest of us: seeing the preach just swindling all your money out of you, then you hear about them stealing from the church or doing some other skept stuff. just made me wanna never walk into a church forreal forreal and just read my bible on my own.
but i started grwoing and reading and seeing that no matter how much people say they dont need nobody else, thats not how God made us. whether its being around people that you love and love you back or in a church like setting, you need people. if you dont, go quit ya job and move out of where you live, and stop using your phone, water, electric, cable, stop shoppin and all the stuff you do (cuz people are involved in it somehow) and see how that work out for ya.
so ive been understanding and learning how much i want and need people.
now, i know that nobody is perfect, and trust, i understand that better than anyone.growing up in a family where giving up and failing was not an option, theres always been the pressure of doing well. go hard or go home pretty much, where home wasnt really an option. so the minute any of us fell out of the picture perfect painting our family had painted, it was noticeable.
but anyway, this blog isnt about me and madea family issues. its about authority (church authority).
so, i know church authority persons are just people and vessels, just like the rest of us. but, if they were chosen by God, i feel like they have a bigger responsibility to have a higher standard of doing the right thing, because not only are they living their life, but they are preaching Life (or they are suppose to, but thats another issue for another blog). so, i feel like there are things that you should know you shouldnt do and things you should know you should do. this is one of the reasons i am struggling with some things right now.
now, since this will be broadcasted on my facebook and twitter, i will not put the specific issue on here because i dont have time to rock the boat over the internet (like, seriously, how old are we) but if you desire to know the issue i am battling with (and some of you do already) hit the cell, fb chat me, send me a message, @ mention me, do what you gotta do.
i was feeling a little discouraged (yeah i have worry too, even though im learning to cast everything on Jesus. can i just say this? Jesus is sooooo Awesome!! like, God is a great listener. trust me, from a regular chick that feels sometimes that God doesnt hear me or answer me, He quickly proves me wrong and answers me in a great way and talks to me so subtly).
so i was feeling discouraged like "God, if im suppose to be in church, why do all these things keep happening to me? like, are my standards too high or something? i dont get it. i fasted last week and had been praying about this issue for a while, then one part of my answer came through Our Daily Bread. that day's message was about not thinking too highly about the leaders of the church because at the end of the day, they are just people, nothing special with the anointing. so that hit me. i guess i was putting people up a little higher than i should have. but the other part of my concerns, im stilling listening and waiting patiently.
so until then, im staying in fellowship with the fam at school, in group, JHouse & TeamJesus Columbus while chilling in the corner with my bible, ipod and my phone.
pray for me fam and remember, its good to be in fellowship. if you trust God and believe in Him and His Word, then you will be in fellowship. God honors it and wants us to be constantly around other believers. but remember not to put the leaders up higher than they ought to be. you don want to get hurt like i did.....twice! just saying...
love peace and pork chop grease...
until next time...
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